Friday, May 27, 2011

Project Positive

So "project positive" was working well, we were having less tantrums, and he was getting his 4 "chores" done every day. Then all of a sudden, over this last week. He was done cleaning his room.  Done.

Yesterday was an all day long battle for him to clean up his toys, complete with temper tantrums and even the throwing of a book.   Wow, where did that come from?!

So after Nathan and Ay have the book throwing fight, he was left in his room in time-out, which was such a commotion that he fell asleep and took a 45 minute nap.  I thought that when he woke up from the nap, this issue would be over and we would move on with the day. I was wrong. He woke up from his nap as angry as ever, preceding to throw a tantrum in the front room. Not allowed. Ayden knows that he is not okay to come out in the front room and throw a fit.

For the toddler age group, tantrums are natural. They are going to happen with most kids. They don't have very many ways to express their feelings at such a young age, so the tantrum brews. The difference is for the child to understand that its okay to be angry, but throwing a tantrum is not. So it has been understood between Ayden and I, that I understand that sometimes he gets so angry he needs to cry a little, but if he needs to do it, he has to go to his room and sit on his bed. I do not tolerate those fits to follow me around the house.

So I did something, I swore I would never do as a parent. I hated it when my parents did it to me, and I swore I wouldn't do it to my kids. But I grabbed a garbage bag, went into his room and picked up 5 random toys and books and put them in the bag.  Of course the tantrum accelerated in seconds. He tried to grab the bag out of my hands and and scream at me. I picked him up, set him on his bed and looked him right in the eye. I said "this is done. we are not going to fight about picking up your toys. if you continue to throw this fit I will take more toys." The tantrum quickly subsided and he looked at me with the saddest eyes. It was hard for me to follow through.  I went to the door and said "do not come out of this room until all of your toys are in the toy box." I took the bag out to my car, where it currently sits in my trunk.

He cleaned up that room so fast, and came out. "mom, where is my truck?"
"it's in the garbage"
"but I need it"
"well, next time you will clean your room when you are supposed to and I won't have to throw things away"
He pouted for the next hour, but forgot about it pretty quickly.

I think its time to clean out the toy boxes and get rid of toys that aren't really played with, and just become clutter all over my house.

This morning, he was eager to work on his chore chart, the toys in the front room are all picked up, his room is picked up and his bed is made.  Hopefully we won't have a day like yesterday again.

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